A publish in r/GirlDinnerDiaries describes a lady’s response after her boyfriend advised her it was her responsibility as his accomplice to have youngsters with him. She and her boyfriend are each 35, and he serves within the army and is residence roughly 4 months out of the 12 months.
The Redditor had promised herself at age ten that she would stay financially impartial after watching her mom keep in an sad marriage to her stepfather out of economic dependence.
She has since constructed a profession incomes $250,000 yearly, has $1.3 million invested within the inventory market, and is presently in graduate faculty.
The unique poster wrote that her boyfriend’s remark left her feeling lowered to what she referred to as a “child making machine,” including that she has by no means wished youngsters. She wrote that the couple had been collectively two and a half years, describing him as her “journey accomplice” and saying he was loving besides throughout arguments about having youngsters.
The lady is presently freezing her eggs in case she later adjustments her thoughts about having children, although she stated she doesn’t presently need them and turns 36 in two months. She wrote that if she have been to have youngsters, she would desire a accomplice who’s residence extra persistently to assist increase them, and who earns sufficient to assist cowl youngster care prices.
She additionally wrote that her boyfriend referred to as her a “hedonist” and a “nihilist” for not wanting youngsters, and questioned why she could not merely be somebody who enjoys her freedom and a quiet life as a substitute.
Commenters stated the disagreement pointed to a elementary incompatibility. One commenter wrote, “If he needs children this badly and you do not, you guys are incompatible. I say this as a mom, youngsters should not for the weak and no lady ought to have youngsters if she’s not 100% positive she needs them.”
Others centered on the boyfriend’s restricted time at residence given his army service. One individual wrote, “Particularly not with some dude who’s solely residence a 3rd of the 12 months, but claims ‘it is your responsibility’ to have children he’ll by no means be round to look after. Not that this man feels like he’d look after any children, anyway. OP, this isn’t a scenario you wish to find yourself in. Since he is by no means residence anyway, there’s not a lot to overlook right here.”
One other shared a private expertise with the choice to have youngsters later in a relationship. They wrote, “Completely. Do not doubt your self. You realize in order for you children. No man can change that. I wasn’t positive for 10 years and we did IVF in 12 months 11 and I had my child. I felt I owed it to him since we stayed married for thus lengthy however he by no means enforced it. It was my selection. And whereas I’ve no regrets, the kid free life can also be fairly nice. Do you.”
The Every day Dot was unable to independently confirm the occasions described on this Reddit publish. The main points above replicate the unique poster’s account of occasions as shared on Reddit.
